if you don’t have anything nice to say… ( on being a b*tch )

March 15, 2010

Have you guys heard about what Miley Cyrus did this weekend?

via alexandra ferguson


Mmmkay, so I made that up. I don’t know what the little chickadiva was up to this weekend, but how many of you were headed straight for Perez Hilton or People Magazine when you read that? Why is it that we’re so fueled and captivated by the demise of those sparklier and shinier than ourselves? So somebody had lipstick on her teeth. So somebody got a little too drunk at the club Friday night. Or Monday night. So what?
via Farouche
Why is it that many people prefer a Worst Dressed List to a Best Dressed List? Why do people feel a tiny pang of pride and self-fulfillment to see a idolized celebrity looking fifteen pounds heavier in the wrong jeans? What part of us can’t change the radio station when that on-the-hour celeb gossip comes on during the drive to work in the morning? Why is it okay to laugh you ass off at a famous singer when you wouldn’t do the same if it were your best friend?
via squirrellicious
Wow – I just wrote an entire paragraph of nothing but questions… I’ve just seen so much crap lately that makes me truly cringe – like the Suri Cruise situation. Why does everyone care so much? I feel like it reflects poorly on us as a society when we’d rather read about the lipgloss habits of a three year old than about the earthquake in Haiti or the successes in the headlines. 
via button empire
The thing that bugs me most of all, however, is the fact that this sort of gossip and scrutiny is pervasive. Reading Perez or Us Weekly and turning our noses up at every celebrity debacle somehow makes it seem more acceptable to do the same to ordinary people who’ve not subjected themselves to public opinion. Our coworkers, classmates, friends, and acquaintances should not be the hot topic over soup and salad at lunchtime, yet they so often can be.
via Breeding Fancy
What do you guys think? How often do you find yourself talking about how you ‘can’t believe she wore that‘ or that you ‘heard that she hooked up with that guy?’ The thing is, half the time we ease into the bitchy gossip without even realizing it. I’ve decided to make a very concerted effort to stick to the old adage: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all!”

14 comments

  1. I want a “Be Nice Or Leave” pillow SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO badly. I’ve had them bookmarked for ages and put it on my birthday list. I don’t think anyone who reads my birthday list can be bothered to make an etsy purchase though. DAMN IT.

  2. I have been making this effort for some time now. Why do we care? I read an article in a magazine that used to love (before they changed editors) that I completely disagree with. Well, mostly. It was “Bad habits that aren’t considered bad anymore” and one of them was gossiping, suggesting that it builds on your social network and skills, in other words helps you be social. I think it’s a load of crap. If you need help being social you don’t need to talk crap about other people. Why can’t we be positive? Our culture is so negative! I could go on but I’ll stop. Sorry…

  4. This is so true!
    My boss and I were just having a discussion about this last week. Growing up the rule was ALWAYS ‘no talking badly about anyone else’. If you have enough time to talk about someone else’s life yours must be boring and you therefore have time to kill and make it interesting. As kids if we were ever gossiping, my mom always had a list of chores.
    Fabulous post, great blog!

    Love&light!

  5. I really thought this was going to be another “I just shoot from the hip, so I’m gonna say what I want when I want, blah, blah, blah” when I seen the title. I thought, “OH, no, not shrimp salad!” I was pleasantly surprised, though. I can’t stand all those chatty cathys and their gossip columns. They disgust me. I’m one of those girls that hung out with the guys b/c I couldn’t take all the chittering. This is an awesome post and I hope you don’t mind if I link up to it in my blog? http://www.fantasydreamknits.blogspot.com I just did a piece on “What is your glamour?” You might find it interesting.

  6. you have good views, lindsay. i don’t get all the hypes about perez hilton either. he’s just too much!

    “Mmmkay, so I made that up. I don’t know what the little chickadiva was up to this weekend, but how many of you were headed straight for Perez Hilton or People Magazine when you read that? Why is it that we’re so fueled and captivated by the demise of those sparklier and shinier than ourselves? So somebody had lipstick on her teeth. So somebody got a little too drunk at the club Friday night. Or Monday night. So what?”

    yes. i agree. without paparazzis and spotlights, celebs are just ordinary people with ordinary people’s conflicts.

    enjoyed reading this, lindsay. looking forward for more of your views! 🙂

  7. I never gave importance to the back lash the celebrities got, because it doesn’t change the fact that they will do exactly what they want to do. No amount of crap from narrow minded judgmental people will sway them. The same way we do. I confess though at a personal level I did it once. To an acquaintance. It started out as a joke but it turned ugly. That was like a wake up call. Presumably harmless stuff from our view point doesn’t necessarily mean that the world looks at it the same way. This seemingly small incident changed me in a big way.

    🙂

  8. Ok I’m totally guilty of this. When I’m feeling dumpy, I like to look at Yahoo’s OMG section for their weekly “What Were They Thinking” series. Guilty as charged.

  12. I just love this post…
    Although when you are a nice person you get walked all over… So I think you just have to find the happy median between nice and what we will call sassy!

  13. I agree with you completely, we need to remember that what we watch, listen to and buy steers what the media and companies put out there, what ever I subject myself to I thin about, Do I really want MORE of this? Does this reflect the world I want to see? If not I turn it off or do not buy it, no matter how intriguing it seems.

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